I Love Bees Axon Clips - recipe3.html

Herzog
Transcript

hello Herzog/Cranky: Hello? Hello, is anyone there? Maria: Quartermaster's help desk, this is Maria speaking... can I help you? Herzog/Cranky: I don't know, but you can sure as hell try. I was on a call with someone there - must've been an hour and a half or something - she kept putting me on hold, and then finally I'm talking to someone. Maybe it was the same girl, I don't know. And then the line goes dead and now I've gotta start all over again with the receipt and everything! Maria: How can I help you, sir? Herzog/Cranky: Yeah, okay. So the thing is, I'm sitting in my study - maybe I'm looking at some stuff on the computer, that's nobody's business but my own; I don't care what time of day, but especially if it's late at night - and all of the sudden these guys show up at the door and start taking my stuff! Maria: I assume "these guys" were Navy personnel?

troy

Herzog/Cranky: Yeah, right - Marines! Maria (garbled): Where and when did this take place? Herzog/Cranky: What? I can't hear a damn thing. First thing I do after this, I'm gonna call the CPA and complain about the sound quality today. First, all the bands go out, now I can hardly hear a word you're saying! Maria (clearer): I'm sure the Chatter Protocol Authority would be happy to hear from you, sir. Herzog/Cranky: Damn right they would! I pay my taxes - which are outrageous, let me tell you... Last year I had this little place in Hellespont - Maria: Troy, sir? Herzog/Cranky: What? Y-Yeah, Troy. Maria (annoyed): So, these Navy personnel...? Herzog/Cranky: Marines! Maria: This "Marine" incursion into your study occurred on Troy, sir? Herzog/Cranky: Yeah, that's what I was just telling you!

receipt

So I'm in my house on Troy, it's the middle of the night, and all of a sudden a bunch of combat booted muscle-heads barge in and hustle me at gun-point - at gun-point mind you - on some kind of transport in my damn bath-robe. Well I had some papers. Very important family papers and I made them promise to ship them to me. I managed to hold the goons off long enough to write out a bill of lading, you know - a receipt. And finally I got this really rude marine to sign it, this 'Lance Corporal', and yet here I am, 3 months later and no sign of my paper - NO sign at all. Maria: You're complaining, about evac'ing from Troy, sir...? Herzog/Cranky: Well, I'm not saying there wasn't a reason for the whole thing... obviously, but the point is I have a receipt! Maria: *sigh* Name on the receipt...?

goodbye

Herzog/Cranky: Marine Lance Corporal Janet Adams, I was very careful to write that down. Maria: One moment sir. (chatter beeps off) (knock on the door) Herzog: Any data yet? Lieutenant: A lot of chatter from the cable, sir. Looks like a ship dropped in, inside lunar orbit. Herzog: A ship... Lieutenant: One of ours. The Apocalypso. Herzog: Jeezus. Lieutenant: Sorry sir, I should have been more specific. (chatter beeps on) Maria: I'm sorry to say Corporal Adams was KIA almost 2 months ago, sir. Cranky Old Man: Oh. But, I have a receipt! Maria: *sigh* Alright. I'll pass this along to my superiors. Cranky Old Man: Well I appreciate that. I know my family papers aren't probably the navy's first priority right now, but- Maria: Very forbearing of you sir. Cranky Old Man: --But they mean a lot to me. And I have a receipt. Maria: Thank you sir, your request has been archived and information pertinent to this case will be sent to this CP Address. Herzog/Cranky: Thanks so much. I really appreciate the-- Maria: --Goodbye.

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key_lime → candidate

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cranky_old_man → alt_burgundy → artifact → standish → harmony

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the_labyrinth Note: AXON CANCELLED → english_longbow → calculus

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odd_duck Note: AXON CANCELLED → wetwork wetwork → dangerous_devices → a_schoolgirl

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termination

assassin → my_conscience

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transfer → moles → you_alive

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no_trespassing → results_are_results

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carmi → breathing_room